More Computer Viruses! Joke

More Computer Viruses! Joke

English Jokes 2023

DANGER: new viruses discovered!:Congressional Virus v2.0 : Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously, but doesn’t allow the user to accomplish anything.Tipper Gore Virus : When you attempt to play any sound file, it pops up a warning window stating that some lyrics may be unsuitable for children.Government Ecomomist Virus : Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.New World Order Virus : Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.Warren Commission Virus : Won’t allow you to open your files for 75 years.David Duke Virus : Makes your screen go completely white.Pat Buchanan Virus : Shifts all your output to the extreme right of your screen.Texas Virus : Makes sure it’s bigger than any other file.Adam And Eve Virus : Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.Warren Beatty Virus : Constantly tries to prove it’s virility by attaching itself to younger or newer files.Airline Virus : You’re in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.Freudian Virus : Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.PBS Virus : Your PC stops what it’s doing every few minutes to ask for money.Jimmy Hoffa Virus : Nobody can find it.Kevorkian Virus : Helps your computer shut down whenever it wants to.Healthcare Virus : Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends a you a bill for $4,500.LAPD Virus : It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in “self-defence”.Billy Graham Virus : When you save a file, it prints, “I am saved!” to the screen.Michael Jackson Virus : Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This Virus won’t harm your PC, but it will trash your car.And finally…JokeGalore.com Virus : poses as a harmless list of funny computer Virus names! Is quickly pa*sed from one user to all other users known via e-mail, consequently consuming all known network resources.

Tag: Miscellaneous Jokes









Do you have a joke? share it with us! Click on the button bellow to send us your joke.





Rate this Joke:
4/5 - (56 votes)


Topic of Interest:
 

Leave a Comment


Health Benefits of Laughter

You may have heard that laughter is the best medicine. However, have you ever thought about it or not? Well, laughing and smiling are infectious. Looking at someone and exchanging a smile can make you reciprocate naturally, despite having a rough day. While only a few people out there know the fact that laughter is good for your health. It doesn't only make you feel good but can be a good cure for the blues.

Top 10 health benefits of laughter

To bring more laughter into your life, let's have a look at the key health benefits of laughter below.

1. Tone muscles and burn calories

Healthy laughter can help in burning calories. Even more, laughter also acts as a cheat sheet when it comes to getting a toned stomach. Most importantly, laughing for 10 to 15 minutes can let you burn up to 40 calories. It means watching a 90-minute comic movie can help you to burn up to 240 calories with ease.

2. Reduce anxiety and depression

Laughter can let you relax your entire body. Even more, it can bring tons of benefits to your mental health as well. A good laughter time will not only let you have some joy, but it can also let you relive the feelings of stress, fear, and depression effectively. Laughing can also improve your mood and bring optimistic, positive feelings with ease.

3. Let you sleep sound

Is the last show you watched before sleep is from a comic genre? Then, you have higher chances of getting a peaceful sleep. It is because laughter's good bout before sleeping can reduce anxiety. It can also relax your muscles and help you to have a better sleep quality with ease. It is important after spending a long and hectic day.

4. Improve blood circulation and flow

University of Maryland researchers have found that laughter can improve your blood vessels' health. It can boost their function and cause your blood vessels to expand and dilate. This situation will play a vital role in improving your blood flow and circulation effectively. So, overall, laughter is important to maintain the best level of endothelium.

5. Boost immune system

Laughter can increase antibody-producing cells in your body. It can also enhance T-cells' effectiveness. Consequently, this will reduce the risks of getting cough and the common cold. As it can help improve the immune system, the strong immune system will ultimately keep the infections and allergies at bay. Even more, laughter can reduce negative thoughts that can impact your immune system. Due to this, a happier person is capable of fighting diseases more than others. It is because he is always in the right mind frame, and his immune system will be in a stress-free zone. Consequently, it will improve your overall health.

6. Enhanced respiration

Have you felt a sense of relief and relaxation after laughter? It is because laughing involves deep exhalation. It will, in return, lower your blood pressure and lead you to a calmer state. Like deep breathing, laughing can also offer you a cleansing effect that is beneficial for respiratory ailments.

7. Ease physical pain

Have you ever thought about how laughter can aid in easing your pain? Well, when you laugh, your muscles move. This muscle movement will expand your blood vessels and send more blood to parts of your body. Even more, the breathing rate also increases and oxygen level in your blood, therefore. So, healthy laughter is always the best way to ease pain naturally and effortlessly.

8. Improve memory recall

Scientists at the Loma Linda University have found that laughter can improve learning and memory. It can also reduce cortisol levels as well in your body. Cortisol is a stress hormone that can impact your mind and body negatively. However, laughter can counteract these effects with ease.

9. Protect your heart health

A good laugh can do wonders to improve blood circulation and flow in your body. Even more, it impacts oxygenation as well positively. Also, laughing can boost your heart rate and oxygen consumption immediately and effortlessly. Consequently, this can help in reducing cardiovascular diseases, improving heart health and respiration system.

10. Work as a stress buster.

With every laugh, your face features send a signal to the brain. This signal will help in relieving the endorphins. It will act as a pain killer, reduce stress, and make you feel happy.

Overall, laughter therapy is highly effective in enjoying various health benefits in life. Make sure to have it daily.

Ads Blocker Image Powered by Code Help Pro

Ads Blocker Detected!!!

We have detected that you are using extensions to block ads. Please support us by disabling these ads blocker.

I Know You Were Drunk Yesterday Joke :