There was a guy in a bar one night that got really drunk. I mean really, really, really drunk. When the bar closed he got up to go home. As he stumbled out the door he ...

These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Outside a country shop: "We buy junk and sell antiques." In the window of an Oregon store: "W...

A man walked into a lawyer's office and inquired about the rates. "Fifty dollars for three questions," replied the lawyer. "Isn't that awfully steep?" asked the man. "Y...

One day this Blonde walked into her doctors office."Doctor, Doctor I'm having these awlful pains in my back.""Well let me take a look."When the doctor looked he had a l...

A young wife, her boorish husband and a young good looking sailor wereshipwrecked on an island. One morning, the sailor climbed a tall coconuttree and yelled, "Stop ma...

10. Lower corner of screen has the words "Etch-a-sketch" on it.9. It's celebrity spokesman is that "Hey Vern!" guy.8. In order to start it, you need some jumper cables ...

A blonde from California decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immedia...

A woman went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out an outrageous yell." "My dear...

You think people should be required to get a government permit before being allowed to reproduce.You want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to have all yo...

A man walks along a lonely beach. Suddenly he hears a deep voice: DIG ! He looks around: nobody's there. I am having hallucinations, he thinks. Then he hears the ...

A blonde woman competed with a brunette and redheaded woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. The brunette came in first, the redhea...

You escort people out of line for having 11 items in the "10 items or less" lane. You walk into a store at 10 minutes to close not knowing what you want and don't decid...

Little Gregory wakes up in the middle of the night feeling alone and scared. He goes into his mother's room for comfort and he sees his mom standing naked in front of t...

There is is this guy and he has three mistresses. Well, he decides that he only wants to have one, so he has to choose. He decides on a way to choose by giving them eac...

A string walks into a bar and ask the waiter for a beer. The waiter says, "I am sorry but we can't serve strings here."The string goes home, ties himself in a knot, and...

Ther was this Indian chief, and he had three wives. They slept in the same tent. One on a bear skin, one on a buffalo skin and one on a hippopotamus skin.After a time t...

The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved to one side...