Johnny was a lumberjack who’d just managed to land a high paying job out in the middle of nowhere. It was great pay, but it meant he was away from any female contact for 9 months at a time. So, after the first month, Johnny’s starting to get restless, and goes to one of the veteran lumberjacks about the issue, who tells him all the regular guys use the “magic tree” around the back.
Now Johnny doesn’t quite like the idea of sticking his member in such a rough wooden thing, so decides to ask around the other guys about how it works. He gets reply after reply telling him that it’ll hurt for one whole week but the rest of it’s worth it. Johnny decides to take the plunge. He looks around the back and finds the tree, with its little hole in the trunk. Miraculously, it doesn’t hurt at all! In fact, Johnny gets quite satisfied and comes back night after night for the next few weeks.
Until one day when the magic from the tree is gone and he just can’t get his rocks off. He takes the issue up with the veteran lumberjack to see what’s going on: “So, I was wondering about that tree. It isn’t exactly working any more, reckon I’ve been overusing it recently?” “Oh no, I guess it’s just your turn inside this week”