How many Microsoft windows programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
three!
one to change it, one to ask you if your sure you want to change it, and one to ask you if your sure your sure you w...
Went scuba diving the other day, I went deeper and deeper.
Until I saw a most magnificent sight. A beautiful mermaid, probably the most gorgeous creature Id ever laid eyes on.
I thought of asking her ...
As the wife shut the front door behind her, I went into our bedroom and slipped on a pair of her knickers.
I wish she would see a doctor about her heavy discharge, I thought as I picked them up off th...
Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are excessively mischievous.
They are always getting into trouble and their parents know if any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are probably involved.
The b...
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer,
"This is the dumbest kid in the world.
Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a 2 pound coin in one hand and two 50ps...
Two police dogs die from overheating after being left in a car - Sentenced to be decided.
They may want to look at a similar case of a black dog being locked in the boot of a car and surviving around ...
I got stopped by a woman in the street today who tried to tell me a joke - it started off really well. Pain, suffering, abuse, maybe a bit of incest. I didn't get the punchline though. Something about...
If I ever have more kids in my household than adults I'll explain to them about democracy. I'll say that the majority group in the house gets to decide things: what food we buy, where we go to have fu...
My former employer phoned me up the other day and said he really needed my expertise once again. They had a problem with one of their machines and they had tried everything possible to try and solve i...
I auditioned for Britain's Got Talent when it visited Cardiff. But, shockingly, I was turned down.
That's right, my signature 'balancing a Mars Bar on my head for ten minutes' failed to impress Simon ...
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